NIAW: National Infertility Awareness Week

 
   This week has been National Infertility Awareness Week. I wanted, no needed, to participate. Although, I struggled for only 20 months, infertility really impacted my life. It was some of the hardness times in my life. I cried and screamed at God. I didn't understand why my body wasn't doing what it was suppose to. I fought feelings of jealousy, anger, frustration, and sadness. I fought back the darkness of depression. I was so lucky to be able to go to an online community of woman, some going through the same thing I was. They lifted me up, while I struggled. Community was key for me.
   I still struggle with some thoughts and feelings. Will I be able to get pregnant again? Or will Eli be an only child? I was so lucky that an IUI worked the first time, many times it doesn't work the first time. I wonder, will I have to go back to the fertility clinic for a second. It's hard when people ask when we will have another, because as much as I'd love for Eli to have a brother or sister, I'm just not sure it will happen. I want to put a small plug in for CNY Fertility Center(http://cnyfertility.com/). They were amazing. They have several locations in Upstate NY. Dr. Kiltz and his staff really handled our case individually and with such love and care. If you live near or in central NY, I really recommend them. If we have to go to a fertility center again, I'll go here in a heartbeat.
       I have some friends who are struggling with infertility. My heart breaks for them. I pray for them and I think of them often. Every once in a while, I have another friend open up about their struggle. They are added to my list. I don't understand, nor will I ever understand, why some of the nicest and great people struggle with infertility. Their heart is so broken and trampled. I wish there was some magic pill for infertility, but their is not. Please pray for these women and their families. Pray for strength to get through holidays, mother's and father's day, and birthdays. Pray for the ability to not punch someone, when they tell them to relax or ask when they are having children.
       If you have a friend who is struggling with infertility, here is a list of 25 Things to Say(and not to say) to Someone Living with Infertility. Please check out this list if you aren't sure what to say. Honestly, a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on was the most helpful. I am one who needs to talk my feelings out and having a friend listen to my vomit of words was so helpful.
    Sorry this is a modge podge of a post. I had all these thoughts swimming in my head and I had to get them out. <3

10 months

     

            
       Today, Eli is 10 months! He is 2 months away from being a year old! I can't believe I almost have a 1-year-old! I feel like every month, I look back and can't believe he is one month older. Today, I looked back on pictures from when he was a couple weeks old. He was so squishy and babyish, now I look at him and he is sooo big. He doesn't look at all like a baby, but a toddler. I miss the tiny little bundle that would nap in my arms, but I love his "mama" and him learning new things every day! He amazes me at how fast he learns new things and picks up on things. <3
      He had his 9 month appointment 3 weeks late... figures. He is doing well. He was 29.5 inches(81%) long and 21 pounds 4 ozs(72%). His head is 19 inches(99%). Ha! My kid has a huge noggin! He has made all his milestones. He was suppose to have blood work, but they couldn't find a vein easily, so they didn't try.

     His 10th month Leap and Bounds:
* He has learned to clap and wave!
* He has decided to not walk. He took a couple wobbly steps, but has decided crawling is easier!
* He are still working on "normal" food and not purees!
* He loves chicken and puffs. He does not love cheerios(I think he is the only kid who doesn't).
* He knows "mama," "dada," and "baba."
* He is working on getting his top front teeth. They are sooo close!
* He is going to bed around 7pm(sometimes closer to 8). Naptimes are pretty consistent at 8:30am and 1pm.
* He can pull up on things really well and still is crusing around.
* He drinks well from a straw! He never got sippy cups!
* His new thing is Ha, Ha, Hah. It's hilarious!
* He blows raspberries on my cheeks and it's so funny!
* He learned how to ride his ride-on scooter, although he doesn't ride on it very much.
* He is also starting to show interest in cars.

Eli and Daddy at the Park!

His first Easter Egg Hunt!

I found one!

Easter Sunday!

10 months!

10 months